Father’s Day can be a joyful time of celebration for many families. However, for children who have experienced the death of their father, grandfather, uncle, or father figure, the day can be filled with many emotions. Understanding how children experience and express grief is crucial, especially during emotionally charged holidays like Father’s Day.
Grief looks different for every child. Children grieve in waves. One moment, they may be playing or laughing, and the next, they may be withdrawn or angry. Unlike adults, children may not have the words to express their grief. It’s important to remember that grief doesn’t follow a timeline. Even if a loss occurred years ago, Father’s Day can reopen wounds.
Here are a few ways to support children who are grieving on Father’s Day and the days leading up to Father’s Day…
1. Acknowledge Their Feelings
Let children know it’s okay to feel sad, angry, or confused. Validate their emotions without trying to “fix” them. A simple, “It’s okay to feel whatever you’re feeling today,” can go a long way.
2. Create Space for Expression
Give them options to express their grief creatively—drawing, writing letters, making memory boxes, or simply talking if they want to. Some children might find comfort in participating in rituals or traditions to honor their loved one.
3. Don’t Force Participation
If schools or communities are hosting Father’s Day events, check in with the child first. Give them the choice to participate or opt out. Offering alternatives, like celebrating another caring adult in their life, can be helpful.
4. Provide Gentle Structure
Keeping a routine can help children feel safe. While it’s okay to allow for a slower, more emotional day, offering the child the opportunity to light a candle or share a story may provide comfort.
5. Seek Support When Needed
Grief counseling or peer support groups like SandCastles can be especially beneficial for children navigating loss. Sometimes talking to someone outside the family can help them open up.
A Gentle Reminder for Adults
As Father’s Day approaches, be mindful that not every child is celebrating. If you’re a teacher, caregiver, or family member, small gestures of compassion and flexibility can mean the world. Honor the child’s experience and let them lead the way.
Grief is a journey, and Father’s Day can be challenging. But with love, patience, and support, children can find ways to remember, heal, and feel seen.