At SandCastles, we’re often asked if journaling about grief can be helpful. I’ve never considered myself to be much of a writer and definitely not a journal-person. I mean sure, I’ve written plenty for school and work, but never just for myself. It honestly had never occurred to me to put my feelings down on paper in any type of therapeutic way until recently.
You see, I volunteer for SandCastles, and during our facilitator training, SandCastles staff had us all engage in an activity where we each just scribbled on a piece of blank paper for a solid minute with the intent of getting our feelings out. I felt a bit silly at first, but during that minute, I let myself get lost in the swirls of ink and by the end, my paper was a mess of scribbles. I managed to get ink on both of my hands, I was smiling, and most of all, I felt a bit lighter. That activity got me thinking, if scribbles could bring me some joy, maybe journaling about grief would be worth a shot.
Journaling about grief isn’t really about the words, it’s about self-discovery and healing. Embarking on a journaling journey is like stepping into the space where your feelings and thoughts meet and can provide an outlet for navigating any and all emotions, but can be especially helpful in expressing and processing the challenging landscape of grief. If you are thinking about starting a journal, but are unsure how to begin, below are some journal prompts specifically designed for traversing the complex emotions associated with loss…or you can start with just scribbles on a blank page of paper.
- The one thing I miss most is…
- If I had to describe the person who died in one sentence, it would be…
- If I had one more day with my loved one…
- Describe a favorite memory you shared with your loved one. How does it make you feel?
- A song that makes me think of the person who died is… and here is why:
- What are some specific qualities or traits of your loved one that you want to remember and carry with you?
- The season that is the hardest without you here is…
- Something that makes me feel better when I have a hard day is…
- What rituals or traditions did you share with your loved one? How can you honor those traditions in their absence?
- Write a list of things you are grateful for, even in the midst of grief.
- Consider how your loved one would want you to remember them and live your life.
- How do you want to carry on the memory of your loved one?
- Describe a dream or a vivid memory involving your loved one.
- People mean well when they ____, but it comes across to me as _____.
- Write a letter to your person who died. Express the things you wish you could have said.
- Create a timeline of significant moments in your relationship with your loved one.
- How have you changed since your person died?
- How have things changed around you since your person died?
- Do you have any unanswered questions about your person or the death?
- How has your perspective on life and relationships changed since the loss?
- Write about any regrets or unresolved feelings you have and explore ways to find closure.
- Something that would have made me feel better when my person died would have been…
- The happiest memory I have with my person who died is…
- Do you think your grief will ever end?
- Write about your day. What was good? What was hard for you?
- What would your person want other people to know about them?
- What emotion do you feel most often in your grief?
- Explore the different emotions you’ve experienced since the loss. How have they changed over time?
- Describe a time you told someone about the death…
- What coping mechanisms or self-care practices have been most helpful during difficult moments?
- Reflect on the impact of the loss on your sense of identity.
- Describe the support systems or individuals who have been there for you during this time.
- What goals or aspirations do you have after the loss of your loved one?
If you are not the kind of person who is into writing things down on paper, there are many journaling apps and websites that you can test out. Websites like Penzu, Evernote, and Journey are great ways to start a journal if pen-and-paper just isn’t your thing. Remember that journaling about grief is a personal and introspective process, so feel free to modify or skip prompts based on your comfort level. The goal is to provide a space for reflection and expression as you navigate the grieving process.